i got to admit tat special someone in my heart is an infatuation ba... i think he knew abt it.. cos the way he talked to me and he 's like avioding me leh!! dun noe!! i'm too sensitive??? perhaps!! i dun noe... i'm believing god to renew my mind and get him out fro my mind.. i dun wan any failure... forget it!!! he's so popular in sch till a lot of gals come to him n chat!!! i felt a little weird.. but i din even bother.. i jus continued to do my hw n revision.. haha!! the one n onli aim in this marketplace is to score well n carry the spirit of excellence wif me alwayz in sch; to be the salt n light n a gd testimony in this marketplace.. in church, i jus wan to serve god wholeheartedly.. let nothing distract me when i'm serving in usher ministry n cg ministry.. i wld like to commit more time in cg since Pastor A.R Bernard once sae cg is ur family, ministry is ur work... ya man!!! i agree.. so i'll be putting my heart more in cg n my cgm... love my cg lotz.... n my usher team mbrs n frenz lotz.. u!!!! u!!!! n U!!!!!! stop disturbing me fro doing something gd for god n in the kingdom of god!!!! ( u means devil/satan) haha!!!
my special someone at heart??? oh man!! after a week in sch wif him, i understand him more.. like wat cyn told me all the bad habits of that special guy u wil like it... hmm.. i dun noe if i like it.. but i jus dun mind.. and find it cute.. haha!! puppy love??? shld be... but i noe that now is not the time.. i need to focus on my studies.. one can onli focus on one thing at a time.. yea man!!! something he jus get into my head esp when i'm resting. but to rest assure, when i'm in class, i think of nothing else except my studies. . haha!! tat's gd!!
today, i went church.. and i'm serving!!! i used to think that i cant cope betw usher n studies but it proves me wrong.. i no longer think so.. i really think is time management.. Today is my Sabbath day!! even God has a Sabbath day after creating the world.. i need a Sabbath day too!!! every sat is my Sabbath day!! i need to get enuf rest and then can chiong ma.. i'm doing Charlie today suppt Chen Huat in terrence.. it's rather tiring cos i've been doing everything on my own.. then Chen Huat told me he cant c me most of the time.. cos i'm always doing thinbgs on my own n not giving instruction to the ushers.. ya.. true!! i din!!! nowonder i found myself running up n down.. haha!!! gd exercise!!! after svc, i was supposed to arrange seats in echo where the sot students are taking photos. then i saw yi han.. is so coincidental!!! i was looking for lorraine.. but i saw yi han!!! haha!!
haha.. i think my eyes r real small!! muz be pose for veri long le... as compare to.......
my eyes r bigger rite??? haha!! but the pic is so blur!!!
took wif daniel too...
took wif tian yi yesterday during the cca day!!
the 3 helpful guys and someone whom i can talk to!!! my seniors in smu and my brothers in christ!!!
hey hey.. i'm back!!!! veri long din blog le.. hahah!! ya!! a lot of sch assignments now!!! stressed!!!!!!!!!!!stressed!!!!!! i found myself handling a lot of things at one go!! like giving tuition, studying, doing projects and presentation, calling my beloved ( first n one ) usher team.... at first, i'm like oh no god!!! y like this??? y m i so busy; i dun really hv time for myself now as compare to nafter my A level exam. i need to do this thing at the same time need to complete this thing.. oh man!!! sometimes i felt super frustrated when my usher team ignores my msg or call.. i'll be like y cant u guys be more sensitive to me?? accountable to me? submissive?? but after yesterdat prayer meeting wif the smu- city harvester i realised i'm wrong. i shld think in this way. Wat i sow is wat i reap.. do i wan to reap such team mbrs ?? Absolutely no!!!! hmm... Prov 22:29- i shld excel in wateva i'm doing and stand be4 kings( influential ppl). Is tat attitude excelling in life??? yea man!!! i shld change.. i shld be less "D" n more " C" n "S".
shall end this blog here.. go n study le.. BB!!!
hey hey!!! i'm back..
oh man!! i'm stil dwelling in my re-elw test!! God!! sorry!! i'm disobedient child of urs... u hv told me not to worry but i'm stil pondering whether i did hear the rite voice!!! sorry!!! think i'm listening to so many worship songs le ba... this feeling of mine kip surfacing in my mind... sorry abba!! i stil love u a lot... the one who nv gif up on me when the whole world turn heir their back at me!!! my dearest abbba!!! even my parents may forsake me but nv wil u do this to me!!! love u dearest abba daddy!!! nv wil i backslide fro ur presence, fro my church... i tx u for giving me such a great church.. i'll nv be ashamed of it!! instead, i wil tell n proclaim to the world i'm fro CITY HARVEST CHURCH.. like it a not, i'm foreva their mbrs.. the passion i hv in u n the church wil be like rain, oil n fire.. nv die off... if one day, the fire dies off, the rain dry up n oil is burnt out, i'll make the effort to start it all over again.. my dearest abba!!!
abba!!! i saw him again today!!! seriously i dun noe wat is love?? i wan real love???
a... wait wait.... i noe wat is real love.. is ur love for me!!! nv forsake me! love me even i lost the passion... allow me to stay in ur presence foreva.. allow urself to dwell in muy heart... is he the one?? or perhaps, he 's my mr ideal... how i hop he is placed there for my sake!! but........ i wil nv disobey u... when u sae no, i wil stop.. when u sae yes, i wil proceed on... i tx u for being there foreva for me... i nv feel so comfortable like today; writing a journal to u!!!
jus got back fro FTB camp last sat...
oh man!! it's super tiring, can?? but overall, i love the activities.. i love my faci and my team..though we may hv a lot of troubles n differences in communication, we stil make it to the end... i love them loz.. indeed i hv a lot of gd experiences in the camp.. it was the first time i slpt on hard ground in a tent wif 3 other gals n a guy outside my tent.( think he can smell my smelly leg) haha!!! t was the first time i together wif my team plan n did a raft. It was the first time i carried such heavy stuff. It was the first time i plan n play a game. It was the first time i was involoved in a mini-club. It was the first time i was carried by boys ard.. Oh man!! they muz be tired. haha!! c'mon!! after all, i'm not tat short and not tat light.. haha!! maybe as compare, i'm light n short. hahaha!! oh no!! SMU gals r hot n tall... It was the first time i had such close contact wif guys.. It was the first time i was showering in less than 10 min n in a flooded shower cabinet. ahaha!!
We hv several games; ice-breaker, painting n designing our own flag, pitching tents, spider-web, measuring the tallest tower, blind-folding games, brick-carrying without our hands or feet touching the floor, pick the sticks games.... is challenging n fun!! hahah!! love ya!!
plus, i hv a super gd faci. he's veri caring.. love him!! he has a super super boy-boy look. BUt.............. he's a alcholic n frequent clubber.. but i wld like to tx him for his care n concern for me!!
oh ya... i failed my elw... sob!! i cried the whole day cos of anxiety n fear in me... oh man!! i muz pass this time rd in order to move on to my uni core.. oh man!!! god!!! help me!!
i went for the paper today... it's diff, veri veri diff... GOD!!!
then saw chi hao after my test. he was finding something but............. he cant find..
in the end, he sent me home..
wow!! i was sitting in his dad's merz.. enjoy the car.. but he drove super fast.. my life is at risk
hey hey.. i'm back fro camp..
i'm tired after the camp!! super super tired!!!
the camp is rather fun on the second day but it was a little boring on the first day...
First day- we met at 730 at harbourfront mrt station. then we proceed as a team to Sentosa island.. after some briefing, we started the game. the game is passing banana wif body parts. Oh man!! this is the rfirst time i hv the closest contact wif a stranger ( moreover, all r guys). Oh man!!!hate it... my team lost it n hv to eat rotten banana!! haha!! luckily, i escaped! haha!! thanx guys!! In the afternoon, we hv mummy's dressing up game. My faci was the mummy.. OH man!! so disgusting... the dressing makes him looks veri veri terrible... Monster to me!! followed up nxt, we played water games... oh man!!! i'm like almost wet when we r playing water bombs.. but, i was to be make wet throughout by going into the sea n dipped myself wif dirty water... so disgusting... something bad is the guy whom i fell upon seeing him is assisting me.. oh man!! so ugly!!! i'm so ugly can!! no image le.. he was at the side : go gal!!! go up to the shore now!" oh man!!! crying!! nO image.. hahah!!! he was half naked!! so shy!! but he's rather fat!! hahaha!! teasing him!!! we then play amazing race fro sentosa to smu by running.. oh man!! super tiring... but it's rather fun n it realy squeeze my brain juice.. Throughout the game, i was pissed off wif a someone.. he's super super touchy n kip touching me!! hate this!!! i noe this wil happen but i tot wun be tat bad.. but...... be4 the camp, he was like asking me this n that till sometimes i got pissed offf.. oh pls, i'm not that kind of gal. i may look n act bimbo but i'm not at all... i'm not a loose gal!! look at urself in the mirror can??? look at ur appearance ! Look at ur inward nature!!! u r jus a monster n satan to me!! someone who sparked my anger!!! u r like ****. i mdun meant to sae all this.. but is u who makes me feel tat. i nv c such a terrible, ***** guy be4.. now ive experience... u r like a ****!!!! go away fro me!!! anothere thing he sae tat made me pissed off: Uni le la, y cant guys slp wif gals.. " hey come on!! it puts me to a danger when i'm slping wif guys like U!!!! ask me to slp wif stranger n he's a pervent!!Come on!!! nv wil i do it.... ther'sy i dun dare to slp the whole nite.. i kip waking up.. checking ard me!!!
second day- amazing race in sch, performances.. jus tat... nothing much to sae.. but every thing i go he wil be behind... oh man!!! monster!!! kip mentionong me to the other faci!! wat's tat!! boost?? show off? ya.. i noe i'm pretty ( hahaha!! jkjk) doesnt mean is for u to look at!!! angry!!!moreover, he did hug me be4 the performance. i;m the overall narrator who was leading the whole performance doesnt mean u muz hug me!! stupid!! so dirty!! the every moment the monster is looking at my shorts, i move backwards. then it was noticed by the guy who made me fall.. he seemed to find it weird but he was there looking at me puzzledly.. Come on! help me!!!
bad bad bad camp!!!!! bad experience!!!
